Thanksgiving in words

I said I couldn't paint a picture of Thanksgiving with words but then it intrigued me so I thought I'd give it a go. Here's how a typical Thanksgiving plays out these days.

Shopping happens....just know that nothing shows up on the doorstep.

Carrie's always the first to arrive on Monday or Tuesday before the giving of thanks because her part of Thanksgiving is hampered by her working in retail. Since the Friday after Thanksgiving's the most important day of the shopping world, she must be at work the day after turkey day. Becky, Keith, Connie, Jim, Joe, Mary and Kelly and this year, Andrew and Denise come on Wednesday afternoon or evening and we all gather at Mom's and play the game of musical chairs (people vying for seats and not the actual game) as we visit and have Johnny's pizza for supper. Also on Wednesday afternoon my girls and I make chocolate, coconut and pecan pies as well as sugar and oatmeal cookies. Caitlin makes the pie crusts. And understand that I'm not even ashamed when I say I've never made a pie crust in my entire life. And even when I write this, I still don't feel guilty.

As the evening winds down at BJ's, the migration to Melanie's starts so we can continue the gauntlet of cooking that occurs during the Thanksgiving week. We hang out as we toast 3 full loaves of white bread and 3 recipes of cornbread for our dressing. People get their hands slapped as they pinch off bites of the white or corn breads, because we're ALWAYS certain the massive amounts of carbohydrates in the form of bread is never going to be enough. Then if Melanie isn't finished with her baking, she makes one each of the following, pies: coconut, chocolate and apple. The most important dessert of the season is made as well.....ITALIAN CREAM CAKE!!! The best cake in the entire world. We eventually pick a movie, drink our DPs and last year we watched all of the Friends Thanksgiving episodes....that happen to be fantastically funny. Then just about when it's time to go home, we remember we forgot to wash the turkeys and somebody may exclaim an expletive (Becky) and then the turkeys get washed. Lights out somewhere around 3 AM only to begin later that same morning because turkeys determined to be delicious must be cooked first.

The next morning Becky usually arrives at Melanie's first and then Carrie and I to begin the many preps for our meal to be served between 2 and 3. All of the bread ingredients have to be smushed into 2 big pans so we can add onion, 45 gallons of chicken stock, sage, turkey drippings and the famous "butter water" that all comes together to make the most delicious dressing in the land. Lots of tasters gather from miles around (or just the den) to test the flavor of the uncooked dressing, which is almost better than the cooked version, until everyone is so full we could stop eating for the day. But...then...that would be ridiculous.

While the dressing's being perfected, teams of people also work on the other menu items which include, green bean casserole, english peas, mashed potatoes, "gut gravy" and rolls. I'm sure I've peeked some interest with the term gut gravy so let me explain. Giblet gravy, as it's always been known, is a mixture of all the stuff that comes inside the turkey when you buy it. Those items include the neck, livers and gizzards. All of these ingredients are boiled for several hours and then hard boiled eggs are added to make a delicious gravy. A few years ago, after Caitlin discovered the ingredients of this gravy, she coined the yummy term "gut gravy" and it stuck ever since. It makes people feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Now while the gut gravy is boiling away, Melanie is making a different version of gravy that has no guts in sight. Although I like the giblet gravy, I do with intent avoid all guts swimming in the sauce. But as you can tell, the whole gravy process is a lovely family tradition.....

Thanksgiving Day is the one day of the year when all the stops are pulled and we try to have 389 "sides" which include but are not limited to stuffed celery, olives, beets, fruit salad, pineapple casserole, cranberries of course, Mary's cranberry salad, which is delicious but not to be confused with the traditional "roll" of cranberries that comes in a can. And let's not forget Connie's frog eye salad...which hasn't the greatest name but is still tasty and delicious.

And as the morning unfolds we assess the progress...dressing done, green bean casserole done, peas opened and on stand-by, potatoes simmering at just the right time and temp. All is going swimmingly until....the most dreaded job rears its ugly head when the celery makes it's first appearance. People who aren't Bloody Mary drinkers begin jumping out of the nearest windows so as not to have to "destring" the celery...it's as bad a job as being a garbage man. For weeks in advance I practice looking busy as well as spending time brushing up on avoiding eye contact to the best of my ability. But finally some poor sucker gets stuck with the job until Becky's back is turned and magically within 5 minutes, "it's finished" is proclaimed or so it seems until the celery makes its debut at the table and people have to pull out a pair of scissors to cut it at their lips. This story is true and not fabricated in any way at all.

As pots are simmering away in the kitchen and the dressing and casseroles are bubbling away in the oven, some of the younger girls (Emma and Whitney this year) decorate the tables. And magically, it all comes together at the same time and we gather in the kitchen to pray and eat. And what took multiple hours and countless trips to the store is consumed in less than 30 minutes. And then the dessert round of the competition begins.

After meal cleanup is steady and constant and then the Christmas season officially kicks off with the building of the gingerbread houses. This tradition began many years ago when Whitney wanted to build a house and then she sucked Connie into the process. And here's how it happens....the construction begins and then Whitney....in true Whitney fashion....steps back and out and watches as others make the houses as she gives an occasional encouragement from a comfortable distance....she's excellent at that.

Then, as the night winds down and everyone's changed into a larger sized outfit of clothing, we gather again, pick a holiday movie and doze and watch and doze and watch.

On Friday afternoon, as many of us that want to, go pick out our Christmas trees at a place downtown and then John and Owen deliver them to all the peeps and before you know it, it's time for everyone to head home.

And that's my attempt at Thanksgiving in words.

The end.