Friday, March 8, 2013

Here we go

Spring is springing even though the cold weather refuses to concede the day. It's still freezing! Which causes me to have to stay inside with the Gap munchkins. We went outside this week and I'm not even sure why I like to go outside, because they have a remarkable ability to find any and every single thing they shouldn't have. At least when watching a movie they are contained in a small space with few distractions. It's something to think about.

Emma continues her world tour by leaving for New York on Saturday morning. And yes I know it's only the United States and not the world, but the world tour sounded better than a state tour. She has many plans for the trip including going to a Broadway show as well as other stuff. Please pray for safe travels as she goes. My heart skips a beat now and then when I think about it coupled with the fact she will graduate from college in May. And by May, I'll have two college graduated girls. Fifty percent of my children will be out of school. I think I need to line up a plastic surgeon! Have mercy on my soul Lord. And I cannot even believe the third 9 weeks of the year is almost over and summer's just a stone's throw away. How when and where did a year go by already? And at the end of this semester....high school and college, I'll have two seniors, which means next May I'll have a high school graduation and a college graduation to attend. I think I need two plastic surgeons! OMG getting old sucks. But achieving goals rocks!    

Having said all that, earlier today one of my children annoyed me, so I called John to vent and as I was venting, one of the unoffending children came home for lunch. When this child deduced I was annoyed, this child immediately texted the other two unoffending children to warn them that I was annoyed. When I got off the phone with John, I asked the child present, "You've already sent out a warning text to your siblings haven't you?" To which this one said, "I just sent out an "FYI" Mom's annoyed so heads up!" Whatever. I decided to change the names to protect the one who annoyed me, although I don't know why. But it's done.  

I've now been blogging for 3 1/2 years,and I've gone back and read a few things from years ago. Some of the things I wrote make me want to shake my own shoulders and yell, "Snap out of it!" I think I've lightened up and maybe stuffed some emotions and I'm really OK with that for now. But I'm gonna stop here cause I don't want to get all whiney and crap. Cause I'm just freaking sick of whining. Which reminds me about 6 or 7 years ago I tried writing a journal for a time, and when I'd finished one whole notebook, I set it aside to start on the next one. Well, about a year or so after finishing the first one, I went back and read some of it and it made me want to vomit due to the stupidity I found in the written words of my mind that were now on a page for someone to find and read. I hated what I read and SO, I burned it. And I still don't regret it. All I read was whine. And not in a good way. There really is no good way to whine. BUT! I'll not be writing any more journals unless I can harness and silence the inner cry baby that exists when I write for my own privacy. Tough times brought on by living life is what caused it. I know that. But you know what? The truth is life IS really hard, difficult, unpleasant, unpredictable, frustrating, overwhelming, tragic and sad. And lots of times the bad guy wins and the good guy gets kicked in the privates. Which really sucks. BUT! Life is also beautiful, awe inducing, breathtaking, rejuvenating, seasonal, amazing, unpredictable (works both ways), inspiring, exciting, sweet, fun and funny. I'm grateful for who and what I have and I'm moving forward. So here's to no more whining. I hope I make it. I have absolutely no faith I will. 

This small amount of writing took me almost 24 hours to write and check and change and fix and rewrite and blah blah blah.... It can be exhausting. 

I'm ending this post with some examples of beautiful things.   






Tulips make life lovelier 

Tater tots. 

That's a word play on later taters.

If I have to explain it, I think I ruined it. 

OK, I'm done. 

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Beautiful and we are still growing up til the day we move to heaven I think!! Good job for allowing God to grow you!!!

Becky said...

AMEN! To all you said and what Melanie said. We ALL whine a bit - my hubby is a master at it - albeit trying to be cutesy. I tell him it is unbecoming! Love your blog - all of it, every time! And love a tulip for sures!