1999

The year 1999 began where 1998 ended...with everyone still reeling from the deaths of Frank and Nina. January was relentless with the kids in school and playing basketball every week but even as life kept moving, everything I did that year seemed like a fog. Many times I found myself drifting off in my mind to another place only to be pulled back by one of my children, family or friends. Everything I was experiencing was painful and there was little comfort in anything.

But time was marching on and we had to as well because life was still happening. Remember in 1998 Billie June had her gall bladder removed but then in January 1999 Melanie began to experience some of the same problems that Mom had suffered and after an "attack" one night at her house that left her on the floor in terrible pain, she had her gall bladder removed January 7. Thankfully after the surgery and some recovery, she was back to her healthy self. Around that same time medical problems seemed to abound because I also had begun to have terrible physical pain in my body. After a round of doctor visits and too many tests to count, they could find nothing wrong. Now I know it was sorrow and stress. And with that January came and went.

In February we had a church fast from the 8th to the 10th and then Carrie came to town February 15-17. Dale and Lydia went to Mexico to see David Hogan and Jay Williams from the 23rd to the 28th. These 2 men are missionaries that have lived in Mexico for many years and they have some Jesus tales to tell. But when they come to preach at our church, they scare the begezzez out of me. David Hogan was here just a few months ago and I stupidly sat on the 2nd row and he got so close to me a couple of times I almost peed myself. He would come over and pause and look me dead in the eye for what seemed like forever. It completely freaked me out. But I'm happy to report I survived and he didn't grab me and throw me to the ground thinking I was pure liquid evil. Although, some might believe I am.

March began with Melanie and Randy going to Corsicana, and then Dale and Lydia went right after them. Apparently both sets of couples hogged all of Spring break there in Texas cause I went nowhere! Whatevs... CAT tests occurred in the month of March which meant John asked the kids more cat related questions. Then John went to Arkansas, Becky went to Europe (whatevs again), and Suzie came to town. Slade played lots of soccer and then Suzie and the kids went to Becky's house after she got home from Europe. The real March happenings occurred at PGCA when Olivia made the 4000's club and therefore had a jean day on March 25, 1999. The 4000's club meant she had made lots of 100's....I don't know how many. She couldn't have made 4000 100's so I'll have to get more info on that. Maybe it was 40 100's. Yep that's it. But WOO HOO for Olivia! March came in like a lion and went out like a lamb. I don't really know if that’s true but I needed a transition sentence here.

With April came Easter on the 4th and all the family came together again. I'll refrain from saying we celebrated any holiday during 1998 or 1999. Instead each time we gathered it was really about learning a new way to be together without Frank and Nina. That's truly all we did those first holidays after the wreck. On the 14th of April in 1999, Frank would've been 49 years old and it also marked the first birthday Dad and Mom didn't have their son to call and wish him a happy birthday. They struggled to survive their grief, especially Dad. For him, many days it was too much to face. Frank’s birthday was definitely one of those days. The toughest thing for my dad to do was surviving the death of a loved one. Sadly for him, facing death began at the age of 5 when his father died. And then he lost 2 brothers and grandparents and many other dear family members. He struggled for years with facing the grief of losing his son and granddaughter and as much as he tried, some days he just couldn’t overcome the pain. It took at least 5 years before he really had some victory over grief.

For the girls, we tried to change the focus by going to Dallas for a girl's trip on the 16th through the 20th. That's the longest recorded girl's trip I ever recall and yet I have no memory of it.

Beginning in April 1999 Caitlin began playing tournament softball and our family traveled all over Louisiana and Mississippi. And while she was playing softball on the road, Slade was playing soccer on the road and life was now slowly becoming a different animal. Carmen's high school prom was on the 23rd and then she and Brooke went to Baton Rouge on the 24th and then for some reason, there was a Mexican fiesta at church on Sunday the 25th. It must have been a school fundraiser but it rings no memory bells. Huge news on the 26th because Emma had a tooth pulled and then she made the 4000's club on the 29th. WOO HOO Emma! And then to finish off the month, a Christian singing group named Truth came to church on the 29th.

After perusing May and so as not to have people leave my blog forever, the following happened. A wedding shower, a rice bag shower, John's parents came to town, all kinds of ball was played, school wrapped up, Melanie and Randy went to Palm Springs California and Becky and Keith went somewhere in California as well. To finish up May Melanie and Randy traveled to the Virgin Islands, Dale, Lydia and Grandma traveled to the exotic locale of Corsicana Texas and John went to Cincinnati. I however stayed home with 4 bad kids and an excellent attitude. I’m CERTAIN! Ummm hmmm.

On June 5th, 4 year old Owen was in a wedding, all decked out in a tuxedo and looking adorable. And this was how Owen’s being in a wedding all went down. I stood at the back of the church urging him to walk down the aisle. He was looking at me like he wasn’t interested in walking down the aisle, and finally we BOTH walked down 3/4 of the aisle. After we parted, he finished up walking down the aisle and then proceeded to the front row where he sat down next to the mother of the bride. UGH! That was NOT the plan. About half way through the ceremony he turned to the MOB and told her he was leaving and then promptly got up and walked out. It was as unforgettable as I expected and the couple is now divorced. Hrmmph…..The rest of June was filled with ball, haircuts and Bible school.

But on June 10, 1999 a terrifying event occurred in the life of Jared. While he and Mollie were driving to a friend's house, he began to experience stroke like symptoms in his body and suddenly, without warning, his body was unable to function properly. By the time he and Mollie arrived at the friend’s home, it was obvious something was terribly wrong. He was rushed to the hospital but not long after, the symptoms went away almost as quickly as they had come. Tests and diseases were discussed but nothing conclusive could be determined. Meningitis was considered but was soon dismissed. Finally, it was decided he’d be moved to another hospital for further tests where he spent many days in ICU with no recurrence. It seemed as if all would be fine until one final test was conducted and something went terribly wrong.

I was cooking supper when Melanie called to tell me Jared had suddenly and without warning gone into a coma and his prognosis was uncertain. The news spread throughout our family and our church and many of us raced to the hospital to find out what had happened. When we arrived, it was immediately evident the situation was very serious. As we stood in the hall outside ICU we could peek in and see Dale and Lydia standing there listening to the doctors talk to them about their son. They looked stunned and distraught. People from church continued to arrive and began lining the hospital halls praying for Jared. We waited to hear any encouraging news, but there was none. Everyone was in shock. How could this happen to a healthy young teenager? It felt as if all of hell’s fury had turned on our family as we waited and tried to have faith that all would be well. It was too unbelievable to try to understand that after the summer of 1998; once again we were in danger of losing another family member. Where was God? Did He even remember us? Finally the doctor came out of ICU as many of us stood nearby. He could give us no comfort or assurance.

Soon after, nurses brought Jared out of ICU rushing him to perform one more test. Dale and Lydia followed behind. No words were spoken, only quiet glances were exchanged. But as the nurses made their way down the hall pushing Jared in his bed, they passed all of the praying people that lined the way. And as they did, Jared was washed over with prayers by dozens of people as he was taken down the hall. I believe he received his healing when he went through the "wall of prayers" as he passed the people. But still after many hours passed, there remained no change in his condition. And as the night wore on, Melanie and I stayed in the waiting room as Dale and Lydia stood vigil by Jared’s bed in ICU. All night long Dale never stopped talking to Jared. And as Melanie and I sat in the ICU waiting room, I had a vision.

There were 4 identically dressed angels stationed at Jared's bedside, two at his head and 2 at his feet. They were huge and gold and each of them held a gold weapon in their hands. They were at rapt attention, eyes forward. Nothing caused them to flinch or waver. They were guarding Jared's healing and it was serious business.

And in true Dale fashion sometime during the night, he snuck Melanie and me into the ICU. The scene was surreal with machines and tubes and this huge cooling blanket over him. It was very scary looking. But as the four of us stood around, Dale poked and poked Jared and asked him, "Jared, Jared, who are these people?" And as we stood there in shock, we watched as he raised his head, opened his eyes and said very quickly, "Melanie and Lisa." And then he closed his eyes again. At some point during the night, Jared came back. It was one of the greatest miracles in our life. When God does something so extraordinary it can’t be denied. As a family we will always be grateful to God for Jared's healing. He stayed in the hospital for several more days but then was released with no affects at all. It was absolutely amazing. We were there to witness a MIRACLE.

And then after a month of heart stopping drama, June came to an end at Becky and Keith's house in Dallas as we all gathered to celebrate Mom and Dad's 50th wedding anniversary. It was bittersweet without Frank and Nina there with us.

July began with the entire family still in Dallas. And this trip brings me to a very memorable story. When my 4 kids were little, our road trips were always adventurous to say the least. As a tot Owen hated ALL fast food and even GAGGED RIDICULOUSLY if McDonald's was even talked about let alone eaten in the car. One time we were traveling with Grandma and we ate McD's and Owen had to hang his head OUT THE WINDOW so as to keep himself from throwing up. RIDICULOUS! Well on the trip to Dallas we stopped in Tyler in order to spend 30 minutes visiting 19 different fast food places to feed 6 people. It still annoys me. I distinctly remember on this particular trip Emma had INSISTED she wanted nachos from Taco Bell and being the stupid parents we were, we got her nachos. After the Tyler fast food crawl ended, we were back on the road, the kids were eating and all was well. Now this was a 4 day trip to Dallas. It was July in the south. It was hot. It was hot in Dallas. It’s always hot in Dallas in July. And there’s always lots of driving to do it Dallas. And the car is ALWAYS like an oven. Well we traveled to and fro throughout the city during our stay just like always. But after 24 hours in town our car began to stink so bad we couldn’t ride with the windows rolled up EVER. If we even attempted to roll them up, the odor would overtake us in seconds. Somehow without our knowledge, we’d become the mayors of skunkville. The kids were overcome with the smell in the back of the car and even though we had air condition it was of no use. So down the windows went as gale force winds blew through the car due to high speeds on the Dallas highways. As the days wore on, we sweated, fumed, and wondered if we'd have to sell the car or drive it off a cliff. We frantically searched from front to back looking for signs of the stinkage but to no avail. We were discouraged, frustrated, windblown and disheveled. All hope was lost. On the third day of our trip we had a family day at our cousin Connie’s house. The six of us arrived on schedule looking as if we’d spent test time in a wind tunnel. But as I was helping my little ones out of the car, one of them must have dropped something or God stopped laughing long enough to take pity on us because as I bent over the seat to retrieve whatever had fallen, I noticed a bag crammed WAY under the seat. It was then that I discovered Emma’s 3 day old nachos STILL IN THE CAR. UNBEFREAKING! Well, come to find out after Emma INSISTED on her Taco Bell nachos, she found out she didn’t like the Taco Bell nachos. So in order to keep from getting in trouble with the Mom and Dad, she shoved the Taco Bell nachos out of sight under the seat. Old nachos don’t travel well in 100 plus degree heat. The entire incident was a harrowing experience in the big city. Thank the Lord we had finally found the stink but it didn’t just go away when it was discovered...it took weeks before the wafting smell of the “nacho bomb” became extinct.

My family of 6 arrived home on July 4th only to find out that tragedy had stuck once again. This time it was John’s youngest sister Sharon. She and some friends had been at a lake near Butler PA celebrating the 4th and as she was swinging on a rope to jump in the lake, her hands slipped and she lost her grip on the rope. She fell upside down in the water and hit her head on a submerged rock and was unconscious when they rushed her to the hospital. We were in shock. We hurriedly made arrangements for John to fly home to Pittsburgh on the 11th and he stayed for 8 days. Sharon remained in a coma for 20 days, but on the 24th of July she finally awoke. But even after regaining consciousness, the accident had taken its toll on her mind and body. And even after 11 years, she still suffers from the effects of that terrible accident. We wondered if things would ever be “normal” again. In one short year, it seemed as if we could barely catch our breath before another tragedy struck, and I fought fear on a daily basis.

It seemed impossible that a year had passed since Frank and Nina died but July 17th found the whole family together in Monroe. That day marked the end of one year of our survival. It was becoming clearer to us that we were going to make it. Life would never be the same but we were getting our joy back slowly and surely. The month ended with Suzie and her kids traveling to Colorado and John’s sister Sharon moving into a rehab facility. And again nothing about life made sense to me.

By July 1999 it seemed as if we’d lived 10 years of crap in one year but God bless us it wasn’t even close to being over yet. Brooke had some kind of surgery on August 2nd and Dale and Lydia made a trip to Dallas the first week of August. Becky and Keith traveled to Jackson Hole Wyoming. And to spice life up a bit...drum roll please...I began to record my family’s meals on August 8, 1999. I won’t bore everyone with ALL the details about our suppers but I will give some highlights now and then. The first ever recorded meal was lasagna for a Sunday lunch. Another was “oven food.” I have no other explanation than to say I turned on the oven and threw frozen food on a pan and served it up to the fam. I’m an awesome cook and equally awesome as a nutritionist. In that same week we ate out 3 nights in a row...and back then I wondered where all my money went. HELLO?? We also had hot dogs and fried chicken and cereal and taco salad and chicken spaghetti. How DO YOU spell nutritious?

By August Emma was making regular trips to the orthodontist at the ripe old age of 8 and school started on the 17th. Caitlin went to the eye doctor on the 23rd and we discovered she needed glasses. NLU, now ULM, but used to be NELU (too many name changes!!!) started on the 25th and my kids were sick from the 24th until the end of the month. August was in the books, September was coming, and John and I would see it begin with a bang...literally.

September 1st was on a Wednesday in 1999 and I’ll never forget it. I always loved Wednesdays back in the day because it was the one day of the week I got my house cleaned…by someone other than myself. That day Mom and I were retrieving my kids from school at 3:00 and at that same time, a storm was blowing in and it was looking like a doozy. With all my kids in tow we headed to my house where Melanie, Mom and I were planning some decorating projects for our church. Rain started pouring down, and lightning was flashing like crazy. This was a serious storm. We made it home safe and sound and pulled into the carport. I was anxious to get the kids in the house and out of the storm and when I unlocked the door, the first thing I noticed was my nice clean house but there was something else as well. I could see white smoke in my den and as we walked inside, I saw it everywhere. I immediately knew that our house had been struck by lightning because I’d seen this same thing happen at Melanie and Randy’s house when Lindsey was a tiny baby. As I was standing there in disbelief, Caitlin opened the refrigerator and this tremendous bright light came screaming out of it. I grabbed my kids, ran out, and called the fire department. But after searching, they found no fire anywhere. They searched everywhere and concluded that I should call the electric company to get my lights back on. I was relieved but it wasn’t very long after that I began to smell something burning. As we stood outside we could smell it in the air. The fire department returned and discovered the main electric cable that ran to every room in our house was burning the entire length of the ceiling from end to end. They had to poke holes in every ceiling in our house. It was a mess. We moved out that night and lived in a hotel until November.

In the next weeks, we had insurance meetings, hired a contractor and ran back and forth between house and hotel and Big Frank and Grandma’s. But before any of that, we locked the doors to the house and went to Corsicana for Labor Day. We arrived home on the 6th and began hotel living. Deconstruction and reconstruction of every ceiling in our house was going to have to happen but the time crawled by and it wasn’t until September 18th any work began. Carrie came home from the 19th to the 23rd and Jared had a research paper due that he had put off until THE LAST MINUTE. He and I worked feverishly to complete it. His chosen subject, mummies, which I thought was a terrible idea, ended up being a great paper. And then September came to a close with Dale, Lydia and Billie June going to Corsicana.

October started off slow with no complaints from anyone as construction on our house continued at a snail’s pace. The month was moving along with haircuts and school and teacher appreciation and then October 15th came around. Our school had gotten out early that day and some of the high school kids decided to have a lunch date together. They were in multiple cars and Jared was driving the old red truck and on the way home, Jared and 2 boys with him were in a terrible accident. The people in the other car weren’t injured but all 3 boys had broken bones and were in the hospital for several days. Another car wreck...it was unbelievable. Too many bad things had happened in such a short time. Thankfully the boys came home from the hospital after just a few days and broken bones began to heal. Thank God they would be OK. Dale, Lydia and Billie June were scheduled to go to Florida on the 18th but due to the accident, that trip had to be canceled.

On October 21st my family went to see Gran and Grandma and came home on the 24th and Carrie came to town that same day. On the 27th in Shreveport, an award was presented to Suzie in remembrance of Frank and some of the family attended. And then November arrived.

On November 2nd after 4 months in the hospital and rehab, John’s sister finally went home. It was a bittersweet time for his family knowing that life for Sharon would forever be altered. Having your family half way across the country isn’t easy, especially when they need you.

Progress was being made on our house as carpet and flooring were installed and a girls’ trip to Dallas was planned for the 4th through the 7th. And hallelujah Lord we moved back into our house on November 10th. We spent 10 weeks in 2 rooms in a hotel but we came home to an almost brand new house. I gotta say that part was awesome. Not so awesome was 10 weeks in a hotel hauling dirty laundry back and forth to Big Frank and Grandma’s, eating out constantly and having no windows in our rooms. But it was over and we were back in our home all snug in our beds. I considered myself blessed. The construction wasn’t quite finished but we made it work because it was time to be home. School got out on the 18th for Thanksgiving and Dale and Lydia went to Corsicana to fetch Gran and Grandma to bring them to Monroe for the holiday. The rest of the family started the pilgrimage to Monroe as well. All in all it was a much more successful holiday than the year before and November was in the books.

December began with Slade coming to town, Billie June and Suzie going to Dallas and Randy, Austin, Jared and Slade traveling to Texas for goose hunting. Becky and Keith’s Christmas party was the 11th and after attending the annual gala, Dale, Lydia, Billie June and Jared went to Corsicana on the 12th. There was a ladies’ Christmas party at the church on the 13th and if it was a Chinese Christmas then it meant I beat somebody down for a better present than anyone else. My streak remained alive with my victorious attempt to leave the Christian party with a non gag gift that didn’t suck. And really, isn’t that what Christmas is all about? Making me happy and victorious? We had a church Christmas dinner on the 15th, the school Christmas party on the 17th, Sunday school party on the 18th and the church Christmas program on the 19th. That sounds exhausting attending all of it...but I did. Family came for Christmas on Christmas Eve and we went to church for Christmas Eve communion like we’d done for as long as I can remember. And our family Christmases were getting better.

1999 was coming to a close.

What a year it had been.

Now I can’t say 1999 was good but even with all that occurred within the 12 months I’m happy to report we made it through together. We could’ve lost Jared twice that year but God healed him and protected him from terrible tragedy. John and I could have lost all that we owned but instead, were handed the keys to our newly renovated home.

1999 was a year spent wondering why but trusting God.

And that’s what you call...the end.

But Y2K was coming. What was going to happen when the clock struck midnight on December 31? No one knew. But people on TV had done an excellent job of frightening millions around the world. You'll just have to wait and see if we all survived.

Another cliff hanger...