Dottie dog

Dottie the dog is extremely under the weather and it's almost too much for me to take. She started feeling bad longer ago than we realized and then last week it was obvious that something was really wrong. And so to the vet we went early Thursday morning with the unknown facing us once again. She had to spend the night there and have lots of tests run but without much info about what's wrong and when they let us bring her home Friday, clearly her anger was directed at me for the whole thing. And somehow because John picked her up, he became the hero. That's sooo wrong. Anyway, she may have some sort of disease from some sort of tick back from her days of living the country roads of Corsicana but we are determined to see her through this without any lasting problems. But because of this little dog, I've learned a lot about how God picks us to be His own and brings us into His family.

For whatever reason in July of 2009, Dottie was roaming the dirt roads of Corsicana and while we were there, she ran up onto the back porch and just sat down. The first time I saw her, I knew I was a goner. I knew I'd never be able to drive off and leave her to continue to fend for herself as well as have many puppies that would have to live the same way she was living. And so when it was time to come home, we put her in the car and brought her to live with us. And the moment we made that decision, there was no turning back.....she belonged to us forevermore. And as we have lived with her for these 10 months, it's been a real learning experience for me. In fact, it's been a pretty great example of how God chooses us, cleans us up and sets us on the right path, loving us the entire time no matter what happens or what we do wrong. And just as we chose Dottie that day, God chooses us and just as we made Dottie a part of our family, God does the same thing for us. And as Dottie began to live with us and we patiently tried to show her that we were good and wanted to help her, we do the same thing when we begin to live our lives as children of God trying along the way to understand how He wants to take care of us as well. And because of Dottie, I have seen how most of the time, I have picked and chosen what I allowed God to be a part of in my life each and every day. Until now, finally, I hope, I have decided to give every bit of myself to Him figuring out that's what He wanted all along.



The reason it's so clear to me now is because even after Dottie had lived with us for awhile, we would still find her scrounging around in the yard for food trying to make a way for herself, even though we fed her every single day. And so just as I haven't allowed God to take care of me, Dottie didn't understand that we intended to feed her and help her and watch over her every day of her life. She just didn't trust us to be her providers and I know I've spent most of my life as a Christian having the same relationship with God. Every day, year after year I'd wake up each morning and begin to fret and worry about whether or not God would take care of us. Really though, I don't think I even included Him in the process at all. I don't think I wondered if God would provide or not. I just woke up every day and assumed that it was my job to make sure I had enough. Whatever enough was for that particular day. And I believed all this time that He was expecting John and I to do the work and worry ourselves. And so for years we did it all on our own not really expecting much or any help from God. And just like Dottie, we foraged around the world looking for something to fill ourselves when that was never what God intended for us to do.

And looking back at the things John and I have been given, I know now that the BEST things we received in our lives came directly from God. Many things we didn't even ask for. He just gave the best anyway. And so at the age of 51 years old, I'm learning to let God provide and trying my best not to worry about how or when or how much He will give us. Because no matter how I envision it to look like, it could never be as good as what He has in mind.

And so as we nurse Dottie back to health.....and in Jesus name she will be happy and healthy for many years.....I hope she will know that we love her forever and want to help her get better and be the best little Dottie dog she can be. And she'll know she's a part of a family that loved her from the moment we saw her and knew we had to make her our own. And in the process of making her ours, it taught me that throughout my own life, God was trying to do the same for me.