Gran
He was undoubtedly the man. The epitome of all things any child could hope for when it comes to choosing a childhood hero. But then again, he was and still is considered the hero of every adult in the family as well. Some people would have called him a farmer, some a gardener; some foolish person that didn’t know him personally might even have called him a failure. But for those of us that had a relationship with him... we called him Gran, or Truly. He was our Truly Etheredge.
There are memories of waking up really early in the morning and seeing him washing our dishes from the night before...or getting his cereal for breakfast. I remember it being corn flakes for breakfast, in a yellow bowl. He never complained about waking up to a job to do... he never asked why we didn’t do our own dishes before we went to bed. He just did the dishes, without being asked, and without making a big to-do about it. He was a servant to all of us. He was also a servant to his wife, Bessie. None of us will ever, for all our days, forget watching him take care of her during her last few months. He wanted her at home with him, and there was never any doubt that the plan would be just as he wanted it. She went to Heaven before him, but he was near her when she went. To the bitter end he cleaned her, fed her, gave her something to drink, and stayed close so she was never alone. It was always about her, never about what he wanted or needed. His life was an example to the rest of his family about how we should always stay until the work was completed. Through good times and bad, he was always by Bessie’s side.
He was Truly gentle; He was Truly grand; He was Truly brilliant; He was Truly loving; He was Truly amazing...in every way perfection. None of his grandchildren ever saw him angry, never raise his voice, and never put others down in order to lift himself up. He was a family man. His family is what gave him reason to keep going. I remember one evening sitting with Gran in front of the fireplace...I don’t remember doing a lot of talking, just mainly looking at the fire. Out of nowhere he said, “One of my biggest hopes for my great-granddaughters is that every one of you goes to their marriage bed totally pure.” I honestly don’t even know if he meant to say it out loud. But I remember sitting in the chair thinking that I never wanted to forget that moment. It was a small glimpse into his heart... I love that what came out was something about his family. Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks... Gran’s heart was full of love for his family. Family is what came first every time.
There’s a story about Truly... he owned a piece of property for a time in his life. After some thought, Truly decided to sell the property because he wanted to buy a house for he and his family. Not long after the sale took place, oil was discovered on that piece of land. For a long time, he thought he had made a terrible mistake...finding oil would have solved every financial woe he and his family would have ever encountered. But if given the choice between the oil and his family, Truly would have chosen his family one thousand times out of one thousand. No amount of money could bring the happiness his family continually gave him. To this day the house he bought is still in our family. And to this day everyone in the family thinks of that house as a place to recharge and refresh ourselves. Knowing that, I think Gran would still count that house as one of the best decisions he ever made simply because of the joy that house brings to his family. Honestly ants and dirt are what is holding the house together these days, but, it is so full of memories that it is one of the sweetest treasures our family owns.
It’s funny how the oil story isn’t what comes to mind when remembering our Gran. The things his great-grandchildren remember are things like the way he smelled when he got out of the shower, his Flintstone boxers he would wear and the bony knees that looked so funny. Gran had the most incredible blue eyes you could possibly imagine. If eyes are the windows to the soul... then he had the purest, most clear soul of anyone on the planet.
We loved for him to hold our little hands; we loved for him to butter our cornbread, or for him to hold our knee when he was sitting next to us on the glider. He would hold our leg and usually not say much, just have us close by. But his hands were unique because of various injuries and four of his 10 fingers were disfigured. His right hand was his best because he was only missing his pointer finger from the joint. His left hand was far worse off, he was missing his thumb at the joint, and his pointer finger and fourth finger were missing their tips. Despite these deformities, he was never scary.
Another thing his great-grandkids loved to do with him was put the fizzy tablet in his teeth. False teeth are a wonder for small children. So we would wait patiently in the evenings for that moment when he was ready to take his teeth out. For some reason, putting the cleaning tablet in the little square container that held his teeth every night was some of the best fun we had in Corsicana.
You could always count on Gran to have on a hat; around the farm it was his straw hat, around town it was either a grey or black hat. I guess he always wore a hat because he was almost always in the sun. He was always in the sun because he was always working on something. Usually his garden; his garden that at some time or another held corn, squash, cucumbers, watermelon, tomatoes, peas, beets and many other things. I guess Gran had to grow so many vegetables to compensate for the amount of sweets he ate. You could count on him drinking a Dr. Pepper and having something sweet in the afternoon. After every meal he would, “need just a little something sweet”.
Another thing Gran did while he was outside was to keep everything he owned neat and pretty. I don’t think he ever thought much about his property while he was here on earth but he did keep it manicured perfectly. I remember he would walk around picking up twigs off the ground because he didn’t want his property to look trashy. He would rake leaves and burn the fencerows so everything would look clean. He was an amazing steward of what God gave him. That’s another example Gran left us; no matter what God gives you, take good care of it.
I remember when dad used to ask Gran, “Whatcha need” when he was eating his meal, Gran would say, “just a little time.” Now, all of us that knew him are left needing just a little more time with our Gran. There aren’t words to describe the impact he had on our lives; but if you were one of the lucky that got to have a relationship with him, you know you will never forget him. I wish I could know him now that I’m older. I wish I could sit with him now while he talked about his life. There are still times that our family is sitting around having a conversation about nothing in particular and the line comes up, “Well, you know what Truly would say about that....” I wish that I could still walk in the little Corsicana house and see him sitting in his chair waiting on us to come visit. Now, it’s been years since we’ve seen him. Now, he’s sitting up in his house in Heaven waiting patiently on us to come see him. Someday, maybe sooner - maybe later, we will all get to see him again. And when we see him, he will smile and pat our knee while we sit next to him on his glider in Heaven watching the sunset over our favorite little house in Corsicana, Texas.
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