Thursday, February 3, 2011

Subbing and the cliffhanger about Madeline

I'm now subbing for Caitlin on Thursdays for the after school program where she works. Lindsey and I get to visit a little as we corral multi short people and repeat the phrases, sit down, stand up, stop that, don't touch that, yes you can go to the bathroom, no you can't go to the bathroom, yes you can have water, no you can't have water, and take that unicorn out of your mouth!

Here are some things I've been a part of in the few short days I've already subbed.

I had a big fight with a little girl named Ryan over a meltaway tylenol tablet she was to take. As she sat there with the pill in her wide open mouth drooling purple tylenol spit and refusing to close and swallow, I told her, "I promise I can outwait you." That one statement obviously had just the right amount of threat because not long after, she finally gave in and gave up and the pill became one with her tummy. The next time I subbed, I said hello to little Ryan and she quickly reminded me of our fight and that she'd been on the losing end. I got a ridiculous amount of satisfaction hearing her say that.

Because it's been too cold lately, we've gone to the cutest classroom to watch movies until the parents arrive to take their precious little gems home. So, the other day as Lindsey was putting in a movie, the previews were showing and one little kid said, "That's the advertisements." Lindsey and I laughed and I said, "What will these kids grow up to be?" Then they started yelling out, "A fireman!" "A nurse!" "A policeman!" It made us laugh outloud.

A little boy named Cade has NO HAIR since he tried to buzz himself twice (at home) and came to school saying he had no idea why he had no hair. When his gmaw came to get him, she told us he had buzzed himself at her house. SO....the question of the day for me was why didn't the "buzzer" get moved to a really high dwelling place after the first time? There's just not enough time in the day for me to make all things non-stupid for mankind.

This last Tuesday I subbed for Lindsey and the movie I picked was Madeline, Lost in Paris. I loved Madeline when my kids were little. Well, I was quite traumatized by the story of Madeline Lost in Paris. It seems Madeline's uncle found the long lost orphan (Madeline) in the orphanage in Paris and was coming to take her to live with him. Oh happy day! Madeline was very sad to leave her friends....especially Pepito, but off she went with uncle. WELL, apparently the orphanage didn't do a thorough background check on dear uncle, because it turns out he was a fraud! Instead of whisking Madeline away to a comfy cozy house, "uncle" took her to a factory in Paris where a mean old former Cabaret dancer (how inappropriate for a children's movie) kept stolen children trapped in a dank old factory making lace 24/7! It was shocking!

Once Madeline had assessed the situation I was very hopeful that with her winning spirit and determination she would help ALL the little kiddies escape with her. But, one little girl proceeded to tell Madeline that if caught she might have all her hair cut off! OMG!!! This is a terrible story for a children's movie!!! Well.....it seems the old lady dancer had already cut off the black hair of the little girl now warning Madeline! And let me say, it was NOT a good look for her. The cartoon people did a positively wretched job in trying to make her short hair manageable. Also this little girl had developed a horrible cough while working in the terrible cartoon conditions of the lace factory. The mean bat lady kept warning her to stop coughing or she'd make her work on black lace in a dark room. This of course was necessary so the lace wouldn't turn yellow from her coughing! (I think that was the biggest fattest lie from the mean old witch).

Meantime, someone at Madeline's old orphanage finally filled in some holes in the uncle's story, a little too late I might add, and the administration and the children now knew Madeline had been kidnapped!

ZUT ALORS!! (That's almost all the french I remember from one semester in college.)

Well, the clock was ticking towards time for Caitlin and I to go home and there was only one child left in Gap. I was very anxious about finding out what would happen to poor Madeline and her newfound underage factory workers. Just as Madeline and her friends tried to make a human ladder to climb up to a iron barred window (it was never gonna work....as well as there was a table nearby they could have used) the last child at Gap got picked up and Caitlin REFUSED to let me stay and see how it ended saying, "Mom you know it's gonna end fine for Madeline." And with that she turned the movie off.

C'est dommage (that's too bad or it's a pity). (I've officially now been through all of my french.)

Did the little girl with the cough (I suspect tuberculosis) get saved with Madeline and the others? Did they all go live with Miss Clavel "In an old house in Paris that was covered in vines, where lived twelve little girls in two straight lines."? Question......if there were only twelve girls allowed to live with them then doesn't it seem that some of the factory girls weren't gonna be invited into the abode? It's a legitimate concern.

Needless to say I've wondered and worried about Madeline and her predicament. The next time I'm at Gap I'm gonna do my best to find out the rest of the story.

Update: I subbed at Gap today (Thursday) again but due to inclement weather, (yeah right) Caitlin's ULM class was canceled and she came and took my place. Therefore, I had no opportunity to insist on watching the rest of Madeline.

Sigh.....

Until I'm able to find out what happened, here's hoping for the best for Madeline and her counterparts.

Godspeed Madeline.

On a side note, many of the people that write children's movies are sick and twisted. Although Barney was almost unbearably full of sugar, he was never involved in a child labor scandal. So, there's something to be said for the Barn man.

OK NOW I'm finished.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

Greatest post ever!!! I'll sneak Madeline out for You to view in the safety of your home but since I don't have to go tomorrow (woo hoo) it'll have to wait until Monday!!!

CAW said...

OMG!!!!! NOW I WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO MADELINE!!!!!
OY VEY!!!!!