Phones, fowl and female emails

Well I know people are on the edge of their seats about my phone. I got a new one. After weighing all the options for a phone, we decided a new one was the best way to go. And by the way, did you know that when you pay the "reduced" price for a phone, you aren't getting that phone for $299 and a two year contract. Oh no, you are paying the rest of the full price of the phone throughout those two years. Yes that's right. I never knew that, but I do now. And although I love a new phone, it sucks trying to get all my stuff on it correctly and make sure it's all there. It wasn't. And figuring out how to get the stuff on it without making a mistake and losing it all! So stressful. 

Another happening on Monday was our air conditioner getting fixed. Back in December we had to have a motor replaced, but ever since then it sounded like an airplane was landing in our hall. It seemed to get louder and louder every day. Fast forward to coming home from Corsicana and immediately hearing a new noise from the AC, as well as it being even louder. I was worried and told myself it was just my imagination. Until Sunday when it was impossible to deny the Boeing 747 in our home. Today the AC fixer came and found another part (of course) that was old and going bad slowly and guess what? The repair man said the older these parts get the more noise they make. So after the repair, I'm happy to report the airplane has left the house and we now have a normal sounding air conditioner. 

Then because I got a new phone and because I couldn't remember one of my email passwords, nor could I find the piece of paper I'd written it on, I turned the same places upside down multi times, thinking myself a fool, only to find the paper in the living room sitting on a table. Me thinks someone's trying to drive me nuts. And that someone isn't me.

When we were in Corsicana, we were talking about the time the house was burgled. That's such a funny word and the only reason I used it. Someone burgled the house. Makes me giggle. SO, one afternoon we were sitting on the back porch talking abut the time the house was broken into, and before the discussion was over we were crying laughing because of the new favorite phrase Carrie coined, "They came prepared to steal the fowl." So I pulled up the post on my phone and we reread it and laughed some more. We all decided it deserved a repost. 

This is the original blog post about the happening:
Monday, October 18, 2010
Well tonight I'm extremely frustrated and pissed. How do people get to the place where they think anything is theirs for the taking? How do you just decide to go break into someone's home and take what you want? I'm ready to crack some heads. Dale and Lydia arrived in Corsicana this evening to find that the house and little room had been broken into. They busted a window and broke the glass in the back door. It makes me so mad.

So far the stolen items include:
2 TVs
1 microwave
1 stereo system
lots of tools
1 air conditioner that was broken....our trick on them
1 coffeemaker
1 maul and ax
THEY TOOK OUR FREAKING SILVERWARE!!!!
THEY TOOK THE FRICKING CHICKENS!!!!!!
AND THEY TOOK OUR TOILET PAPER!!!
Maybe they took the tp so in case the police caught them and they **** themselves they would have some?

I don't know but it's absurd.

I mean....they took the chickens and now the poor little chickens have been relocated against their will. If anyone sees 4 chickens in a Ford Taurus, call the police. They're hostage chickens! I just hope they weren't supper last night.

And now I'm posting the following excerpts from emails that flew after the stealing was discovered. People....you just can't make some of this stuff up.

It began with an email from Melanie telling us the bad news....

Melanie: Well peeps it's happened, Gran's house was broken into and they took EVERYTHING: TV's, microwave, coffeepot, our SILVERWARE. They took all the tools. They left the air conditioners and beds. WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE WE GONNA DO???????? Oh yeah they broke the glass in the porch door and the window over the stove.

Lindsey: Well don't ask Lisa for ideas. She has no good ones. (I have no idea why Lindsey attacked my creativity, because this happened almost four years ago. But that statement was rude.) 

Lisa: Whatever Lindsey.

Lindsey: You know its true!! (Even after four years it still stings.) 

Carrie: Are they calling the police?

Lindsey: Police came and went. Basically nothing they can do.

Carrie: But they took silverware then it sounds like they didn't have a truck. My detective self figures. (This is an editor's note: That's one of the funniest things I've ever read in my life.)

Lisa: Ummm I'm gonna need some explanation about that deduction. (I still do.) 

Carrie: I MEAN that they couldn't fit chairs in a CAR obviously..... They didn't have room to steal chairs. If they took everything else, TV's fit in a car but unless I am there to fit them in my size car, they didn't have a vehicle big enough to take chairs!!!!!!!!! Explained enough????

Lisa: No because silverware fits anywhere. (That's still true four years later.)

Lindsey: Lydia now that stealing is in the air I may steal your perfectly shaped punkins at gmas!!! (Apparently Fall and felonies were filling the season. Say that fast 5 times!)

Caitlin: Olivia is adamant that they are illegal immigrants!!! It's cracking me up. First she thought that since they took the silverware it could only be illegal immigrants but then when I just told her about the TP she said well that just confirms it. Who else would do that? (Political correctness? I think not.)

Carlie: Olivia, I totally agree. Its like robbery 101....if there is toilet paper, ALWAYS take it. Always take the **** tickets. (This is also freaking funny.)

Editor's note: After it was discovered that the chickens had been stolen, the following email was sent:

Carrie: So they live somewhere in the country so they can have fresh eggs!!

Maggie: Or fresh chicken... (oy poor chickens)

Carrie: So they either had an interesting ride home with a car full of chickens or they came prepared!!!

Lindsey: Carrie what's the appropriate chicken stealing car?

Lisa: Ha ha ha ha Lindsey. And yes Carrie I'm waiting to hear this.

Carrie: Well if they didn't have a cage to put them in they was just a flyin!!!!!!!

Lisa: We need to know the car choice though. You haven't answered that. I'm thinking a Ford Taurus?

Carrie: well what ever car is big enough for me to bend over so y'all can kiss my wide lily white...............think about it people!!!!!!!!! They came prepared to steal the fowl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Annnnnd there it is. Family history was changed forever on October 18, 2010. And we are all better for it.)

Carlie: Hahahahahahahahahahahahhaah "They came prepared to steal the fowl!!!!" One of the best sentences ever typed. Hahahaha

Melanie: I am never shoeless in corsicana (I have no idea why Melanie said this. I feel like some information got left out.)

Carrie: That's very wise

So then later Becky emailed with a list of the things taken. Note the fowl reference which is so freaking hilarious I can barely stand it.
Becky:So what is missing?
TVs
Microwaves
Coffeemaker
Tools...like in the living room?
Silverware
Maul
Ax
Fowl
TP
What about quilts and bedding?

Carrie: Mother said they did not steal the swings and don't know about the lawnmower, but they would have to have bolt cutters for that and they probably couldn't fit those in the Ford Taurus and would have had to ride the POS (the mower's not good) mower away and we all know it won't start. I assume you have read all the emails to understand the car reference

Becky: Reference to the Taurus yes got it

Back to the editor....even in the state of pistness I'm in about the stealing of our stuff, I literally have laughed so hard I've cried while putting this post together.

Now back to present day. What I really love about those emails is that in the midst of being robbed, we still found much to laugh about. Don't get me wrong, we were very angry, but in spite of the circumstances we have a fun memory courtesy of Carrie. Well done. Gotta love it. 

Now I'll leave you with a few more Corsicana photos.

More later. But it's 2:58 and I'm beat.